I personally still use a hydrometer, and unfortunately you have to account for the margin of error that it has as its not really 100% accurate - in saying that best way is to make sure the sample is at the right temp, shake it around a bit, hold it in your hand etc, to get rid of most of the excess Co2 then take a reading, I generally just leave my sample out for 30 odd mins then come back to it..
Nah, a refractometer isn't the answer - unfortunately they're as bad or worse than hydrometers.
Make sure you're compensating for the sample temperature. This will most likely be the problem - you take a reading before lagering at like 12C, drop the temp to 3C or so, you've just cooled the wort and made it denser, raising the gravity.
To eliminate the possibility of it being CO2 when the sample has warmed shake it up a bit to release the gas, come back after a while and give it another shake then let it the head settle and take your reading.